Hisotian's Note: This book is stupid!

Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot.

By Order of the Author

-Mark Twain

The first of many annoying Authors Notes: I wrote the historians note myself so historians, don’t take up arms against me. Also, as it will become abundantly clear, most all English teachers will use my quoting of the Great Mark Twain to the effect that I believe myself to be on par with The Great Writer. Therefore in order for you to stop pondering these things and get on with the story I must simply say that I like Twain’s work, and if he hadn’t already written this marvelous bit I would have, as it seems to fit this humble work of mine nicely.